As we've been facing some financial challenges lately (nothing terribly serious, but just fairly normal single income two kids kind of struggles), I've been doing some reflecting on and reevaluating of our situation and also of my growing up years. Maybe some of you can relate to something that I've come to realize about myself. I've always looked upon people who had an obvious attitude of entitlement and judged them pretty harshly in my mind, thinking to myself, "Why do they think that the world should be handed to them on a platter?" Guess what? I'm ashamed to say that I think I'm battling a fight against the entitlement disease, myself. Sometimes I find my gut screaming out, "Why does it have to be so hard? When will we feel an easing up of these challenges?" In some of my thinking and praying lately, I've just been sensing the Lord leading me to hear the rather unattractive whining tone in my voice. My mom gave me a Mary Englebreit refrigerator magnet (I scanned it in for you to see) that has the words "Snap Out of It!" written on it (something only your mother or a really good friend could give to you), and I think I need to heed the magnet's direction. But how did this little feeling of entitlement creep up on me? Well, I've been trying to think about that, too. When I was a kid we didn't have much, although I don't remember feeling like we were deprived. The Lord took care of us, and we were so blessed. Mom would always say, "We're rich in love!" As we grew older, Dad moved to larger churches and Mom went back to work when I was in highschool. There wasn't as much coupon clipping, and it wasn't ever as if we were wealthy, but we grew accustomed to a little bit easier living. So much of what we see in our society leads us to believe that we are entitled to a life of ease and luxury, and young couples getting married and just starting out together often feel as if they should have homes and belongings as nice as their parents. Please don't misunderstand me, we haven't gone out and purchased a large home and filled it with things we can't afford, but I think it's sometimes easy for me to think things ought to be a little easier for us--like they were for my family in my older teenage/college years. (I know my dad would laugh if he read this, because I'm sure he didn't think of those years as easy being that it was the beginning of putting 4 children through private college!) Anyway, I think it's easy for me to forget that they didn't start so easy for them. They worked hard, and most importantly, they were good stewards of what the Lord entrusted them with. I really want to follow their example. But maybe some of you have had this feeling creep over you before (and I'm convinced these thoughts are the subtle workings of the devil)--this feeling like, "I deserve to have/do..., because..." In the Beth Moore study I'm soon to finish, we were just talking today about what life would be like if we really got what we deserved. Ugh. Praise God for Psalm 103:10! "he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities." I have to force myself to stop and say to myself, "You deserve what, Adrienne? What? Do you really want what you truly deserve?" In this same study I mentioned, Beth talks about how we often are unsatisfied by our own blessings and desire other people's blessings. Oh Lord, I want to fully live in the blessings you've given me and to be a good steward of them, too, because I know I have much more than I deserve!
No comments:
Post a Comment